Gay people should be allowed equal rights as anyone else.
That is true, and it's good.
Not many people are considering what the repeal of this does, and what the impact really is, however. First, I have to say a couple things - if you don't agree with them, then I probably won't make my point.
1. Everyone should have the same rights and opportunities (if the have the ability) as anyone else.
2. Military service has the potential for exceptionally close quartered, intimate, stressful conditions. Moreso than what anyone else will experience.
3. People have individual feelings about different things, and the right to those feelings. Specifically, in this case, the right to be uncomfortable in compulsive close quarters with gay people.
4. This isn't about what you or I think or feel. This is about what the people affected think and feel.
So let's look at the "best case" for everyone type of situation. Say, some Army administrative office. The people working there are more like civilians - they have regular hours that are more like the standard 40 hour work week. They stay in one place. They go home every night. They rank structure is a little more relaxed. Physical training is not as emphasized and is usually an "on your own" type of thing. If someone is uncomfortable with someone's sexuality, the most intimate situation they might find themselves in with that person is in a bathroom for a couple of minutes. This is kind of situation is easily avoided, or, brief enough to tough it out.
On the flip side, take, say, a USMC Infantry company who has been in Afghanistan for months. Their situation is different. They work long hours performing difficult, stressful work in dangerous conditions. They frequently move. They are thousands of miles from home. They work and live with the same people for months. There is little, or no, privacy whatsoever. There is a constant reminder and threat of death. These people might NEVER be more than 6 feet or so away from any other random person. They eat, sleep, shower, go to the bathroom, laugh, fight, cry, work and play together - not by choice, by chance. The most intimate situation in this case is MUCH more intimate than the other. Imagine trying to masturbate. Take a ***. Whatever. If someone has an issue with someone's sexuality there, there is NO AVOIDING it - it can become an aspect of every part of your life.
Keep in mind that tiny stresses in this situation can very easily become huge issues. I've seen people come to blows over what is normally very stupid an unimportant things - Pepsi vs Coke kinds of things. Maybe you can see how someone's sexuality can be a major distraction.
So, who else has sexuality different from the average Infantryman? Women. (But whoever reading this can just use the opposite sex of them. I will default to females because I am a male, but I just mean the other sex.) Here's your situation:
1. You wake up everyday a couple feet from a woman.
2. You shower with women.
3. Women are there when you ***.
4. You eat with the same women.
5. You work with the same women.
6. You work out with the same women.
7. You shave with the same women.
8. You do laundry the same women.
9. Your weakest moments are the same women.
10. Your entire life is spent the same women.
11. Oh yeah - you almost died yesterday, and you might die today, your grandmother died, your wife is cheating on you, your dad has cancer, and you won't be home for another six months.
Isn't it reasonable to see how that can stress you out?
So what's the choice? Are you going to legislate complete open mindedness? Cancel shyness? Force everyone to have the same attitudes? It seems to me that keeping as many causes of stress away as possible is the best option for mission accomplishment AND overall troop welfare.
Is that fair? Absolutely not. Does it work? Absolutely.
Now, before people start crying about how backwards and intolerant the military is - stop. While you can't get rid of that in general, the people I've known and served with were far more tolerant to things like race, religion, heritage, etc. We came from far different backgrounds, but ended up family. So have some patience.
So here's another thought. Think about how the world, at least the US, really works. Let's say, I have a problem with Joe Smith telling stories about his sex life. All I have to do is say something, and he has to stop. Now, though, that depends. Because let's say Joe Smith is gay. If I tell him to stop, and he doesn't like being told that - oh, now I'm discriminating. Or at the very least, now I am starting the long path to try to prove to someone that I am not discriminating, that I really just don't want to hear sex stories, that gay people are cool, and that I should in fact be allowed to continue to perform my chosen profession.
It's weird how equal rights often is anything but.
Anyways, that's all some of my thoughts about it. Hopefully it makes some sense to someone!
