my gays, long time no me be on ffxiah!
how is everyone
FFXI LGBT Community, Who Are You?
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FFXI LGBT Community, who are you?
YouTube Video Placeholder SPecial tracks for all gay /// behind th wheel DEPECHE MODE !!! Anyone here going to LA/WeHo pride tomorrow?
Leviathan.Hohenheim said: » my gays, long time no me be on ffxiah! how is everyone 
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[31 days between previous and next post]Cerberus.Elvyn said: » They need to give us Ferreous Coffin as a trust npc!!! Galka WHM ftw!  Haha! Now my Galka
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Been forever since I posted, but I was curious! Anyone I know hitting up Gaymerx2?
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[42 days between previous and next post]Thhhhhhis... may not be the right place for this and may be a necrobump...
I couldn't find a place to ask, but is there any active Gay Friendly Linkshells out there, I'm on Asura, and my last LS was not very gay friendly at all as they would just use slurs all the time and make fun of homosexuals. I tried to ignore it, but when they started to mess with me after I asked the LS Leader to put a stop to it, and he was doing it right along with them... I had to get out of there. Anyways, thanks for listening. There was this thread from about a week ago: http://www.ffxiah.com/forum/topic/44151/lgbt-linkshell-prideforever-is-now-recruiting/
On Bahamut though.
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This is absolutely the right place! Situations like yours are a large part of the reason this thread exists. It's a shame that we have to go to so much trouble sometimes just to find an environment that isn't hostile by default, while most people only have to worry about finding a group that matches their goals and schedule.
I don't know about Asura, but I think Siviard's linkshell on Shiva could potentially be of interest to you. Maybe he'll drop in and tell you about it. At any rate, hope you find one soon! Edit: oh, you found their thread already lol well that works out. XD
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Gurrrrrrrrl is someone talking about me??? My ears are on FIRE!
At any rate..... Minions is a Pet Job LS, and most of the things we do (or try to do, we conduct many science experiments) put an emphasis on using BST, SMN, PUP pet strategies. But we also do things, like Delve when the mood strikes, using "lolNormie" strategies so having other jobs leveled and geared are a good thing. If you're just returning to the game, we have no problem helping people get caught up, as we seem to enjoy doing SKC20 fights a bunch (gives me an excuse to bust out my Rune Fencer and look fabulous in PINK ARMOR) to help people upgrade their AF pieces. There are also several "family members" in the shell, and the others who aren't "family" are friendly, so you won't see that stupid "that's gay" comment, and if someone slips up when I'm around, I quickly let them know about it.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1df_i26wh-w
To get back on topic for Velderin. No more LGBT shells on Asura afaik, there have been many. Still lots of gays around. I'd tell you to apply to my shell but we're not social (event based LS) so that's not what you're looking for probably, also we do make fun of gays (sex in general tbf) quite a lot. In a good way though, nobody is homophobic, and I try to galkarape half the LS members on a daily basis ^_^ Shiva.Siviard said: » (gives me an excuse to bust out my Rune Fencer and look fabulous in PINK ARMOR) RUN's relic is a lovely, almost pastel, salmon color. Not the ***'s PANK everyone who's colorphobic makes it out to be. ;p Also: hello~ other gay peoples... Nice to meet you. Asura.Velderin said: » Thhhhhhis... may not be the right place for this and may be a necrobump... I couldn't find a place to ask, but is there any active Gay Friendly Linkshells out there, I'm on Asura, and my last LS was not very gay friendly at all as they would just use slurs all the time and make fun of homosexuals. I tried to ignore it, but when they started to mess with me after I asked the LS Leader to put a stop to it, and he was doing it right along with them... I had to get out of there. Anyways, thanks for listening. I wish you were on Bahamut :( I have my own LGBT linkshell on there and I'd definitely give you a pearl. In any case, don't let those haters get to you, they are just immature and insecure about themselves so they act like cowards and troll those of us who are gay, out and open. If you ever decide to transfer servers, come to Bahamut and I'll give you a pearl. It's called "PrideForever". :) @Pleebo Thanks for mentioning my ls thread! <3 I dunno, I kinda have mixed feelings on that.
It's true that there are jerks around and... I don't have many words to say about those ***. Just ignore them, try not to hang out with them, do not let their silly offense get to you, I dunno. I think throughout our lives we've all learned to deal with such people one way or another. But there's another thing that annoys me, people who seem to be on a holy war, constantly on the defensive, permantenly ready to point their fingers everywhere shouting "homophobes!" I mean... relax! A bit of humour and self confidence doesn't hurt, don't have to start a war every *** time, even because a lot of times I've seen this happening there was no homophoby at all, in the slightest way. I mean... we all know life can be hard at times concerning these matters, but behaving like you're a jew in europe during world war 2 doesn't really help, does it? Just makes you look paranoid, and annoying.
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Asura.Sechs said: » I dunno, I kinda have mixed feelings on that. It's true that there are jerks around and... I don't have many words to say about those ***. Just ignore them, try not to hang out with them, do not let their silly offense get to you, I dunno. I think throughout our lives we've all learned to deal with such people one way or another. But there's another thing that annoys me, people who seem to be on a holy war, constantly on the defensive, permantenly ready to point their fingers everywhere shouting "homophobes!" I mean... relax! A bit of humour and self confidence doesn't hurt, don't have to start a war every *** time, even because a lot of times I've seen this happening there was no homophoby at all, in the slightest way. I mean... we all know life can be hard at times concerning these matters, but behaving like you're a jew in europe during world war 2 doesn't really help, does it? Just makes you look paranoid, and annoying. I don't know about YOU, but to be called a *** or a **** on a daily basis is discriminative. In places like Nigeria and Iraq, more like us are getting stoned to death and even executed or imprisoned because we are gay. I don't know what you consider to be a "holy war" but to me there's no humor in being called a f**. We didn't start this "holy war" some homophobic straight people did. I won't let anyone bully me or my fellow gay peers because of who we are and who we love in my presence. To those of you who are Straight and support us, thank you. I'm gay and I say F to the a to the g all the time.
I also call things gay. Does that make me a homophobe? It's just words I grew up hearing used in a playful way, sure some people can take them seriously and be offended by them, but that's just not me. I'm not saying it's right to use the words, it's obviously not everyone's cup of tea. But they never have, and never will bother me. I've always been of the mindset that a word only has power over me if I allow it to, and I just simply don't. *disappears for another 3 and half years* Fenrir.Stiklelf said: » I'm gay and I say F to the a to the g all the time. I also call things gay. Does that make me a homophobe? It's just words I grew up hearing used in a playful way, sure some people can take them seriously and be offended by them, but that's just not me. I'm not saying it's right to use the words, it's obviously not everyone's cup of tea. But they never have, and never will bother me. I've always been of the mindset that a word only has power over me if I allow it to, and I just simply don't. *disappears for another 3 and half years* It just makes me sad that anyone would even use that word as a new way of saying "stupid". Who the heck came up with this stuff? Why can't people just say "stupid" or whatever like that? Why do people have to use the word "gay" to mean "stupid"? How the heck is this even legal? There's nothing playful about saying "gay" as a term for "stupid". The "Fa" word shouldn't be legal either. It just promotes more hate. I guess I'm just from an era where me being called a "f**" to my face by straight people was commonplace. Seriously! I don't know wtf is up with this new generation thinking these words are okay and "playful" to use like that. It makes me sick. Those words just ooze hate and for you to think that ***is okay something is wrong there. While I agree that if you don't let words get to you, you can get pass it, but even still NO ONE calls me slurs like that to my face and walks away. I like to defend myself and if you let homophobic losers push you around they will think they have power of you and will continue their wrong doing. Words are deadly, even if you ignore them that won't stop homophobes from continuing to use it to terrorize others. Defending yourselves isn't wrong. It will just show them how tough you are inside and shows them that you will not bullied for you being who you are. Just ignoring them won't make it stop or stop them from trying to take a stab at you. Guess that's why some people call me a LGBT visionary here at home cause I fight for the rights of all LGBT, even if it costs me my life doing so, I won't let homophobic people push me or any other of my peers around. Think what you will of me, but that's my way of dealing with how crappy this world is.
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Good lord calm your ***.
I know 2 straight people who say f** (since apparently we can't be adults and type it), I can't even count the number of gay people I know who say it. If you are really set on championing this drop the "straight people" from your speeches. Asura.Ina said: » Good lord calm your ***. I know 2 straight people who say f** (since apparently we can't be adults and type it), I can't even count the number of gay people I know who say it. If you are really set on championing this drop the "straight people" from your speeches. Mostly because some Straight people use it the most. I don't think even the LGBT community should use that word! It shocks me that those of us in the LGBT community use that word since I'm so used to some straight homophobic douchebags using it whenever they get the chance. It horrid having even my fellow gays using it. It's just like why those who are Black don't like when people use the "N" word. It's a freaking hateful and harming word. Just like I think the "Fa" word is hateful and harming. No one should use the "Fa" word just like NO one should the "N". Both words are offensive and just shouldn't be said at all. ANYONE who uses that word should think about the number of times that VERY WORD has caused the deaths of many of us who have committed either Suicide or were killed because of us being gay. Think about that before you think saying that's so "***" or f** is okay!
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So is it okay to go to black ppl and use the N word, simply because its a word? Do you not see his point as to why its offensive? I cringe when I hear F*g because it carry so much hate behind that word in general. I think some gay ppl try to accept it so they appeal to straight homophobes somehow in some twisted way. You aren't "cool" for saying it, just makes you look dumb imo. People don't say things like N word or other slurs w/o bad looks etc, this F*g and "gay" as derogatory will end up the same as the N word.
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Bahamut.Protectorchrono said: » I don't know about YOU We're full of catholic extremists and homophobes, we don't have any rule or law to protect against homophoby, we cannot marry, we cannot adopt, we don't even have anything similar and we don't have equal rights. Luckily we don't get people killed because of their sexual orientation, not by the state at least. Nice to meet you. Now you "know about me". Quote: but to be called a [cut] You barely read my post and saw what you wanted to see in it, a reason to turn it into political and ideological ***. I've been a gay associanist militant probably before you were born or even know you were gay. I've been the president of a local association for over 2 years and have been in the associationism world for quite a while. I'm not the kind of people who refuses to take action, one of those people who like to live their tranquil life refusing to "fight" for something, for their rights, or for other people like them. I used to hate those people, now I understand their point of view. I don't agree with it, but I respect it now. That's not the point though, I wrote this just to let you know that I'm not against social, political and ideological laws. The problem is another. There is a time and a place for those things, and there is a time and a place where all those things are completely... out of place. It's exactely like in your post. Clearly I wasn't talking about people who are suffering in Nigeria, Russia or other countries. I was talking about FFXI people in this game, namely on Asura. I was talking about people who think they have to fight for their rights every *** second of their life, even in virtual worlds. Sometimes that actually, sadly, is the case. But that's not what I was talking about of course, I'm talking about people who overdoit, who cannot take jokes, who do not know the meaning of the word "humour". People who live in paranoia and see homophobes everywhere, even when there's no homophobe at all. That's the kind of attitude I hate. Trying to turn everything into your own personal holy war and behaving like you're the poor, little, harassed victim even when nobody was giving a *** about your or even considering you. It's exagerations like these that get on my nerves.
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Oh and about the taboo words, it's a wider and more complicated issue.
My point of view about it is probably biased because of my studies (semantics and linguistics) but I really don't think censorship is the solution, ever. People need to be educated, people need to be brought on the path of empathy so they can understand why doing something is bad. Forcing them to do that by turning some words into taboo and trying to guilt trip people who use them isn't gonna change society, in my view. It's not the word that's offensive, is the meaning behind it, the purpose for which it is used. Some people, take for instance Joseph Nicolosi and his crew, manage to be way more offensive while using a very subtle and appearently perfectly polite language registry. I don't like the word "***", and I don't like expressions like "whoa that's gay", but I don't feel like I need to point a gun at people who use those words, even because majority of them are "unaware culprits". They use those words without bad intentions, it's just habit. I'm not saying that we should completely ignore how people use certain words, it has a certain relevance of course, but sometimes I'm afraid people are too focused on the words instead than on what really matters (the meaning behind them and educating other people about not being racists). It's like, what was that metaphore? The finger pointing to the moon and people being able to see just the finger? Yes, something like that, imho. The gay thing never really bothered me.... Namely because I viewed it as an extension of the word ***... Which means strange or unusual.
So that whole thing I've never understood why it offends people so much... Not that I use it for stupid... If I'm calling something gay, it's homosexual. But the Nword and Fword... No one needs to say that. Ever. They demean us all.
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Asura.Sechs said: » Oh and about the taboo words, it's a wider and more complicated issue. My point of view about it is probably biased because of my studies (semantics and linguistics) but I really don't think censorship is the solution, ever. People need to be educated, people need to be brought on the path of empathy so they can understand why doing something is bad. Forcing them to do that by turning some words into taboo and trying to guilt trip people who use them isn't gonna change society, in my view. It's not the word that's offensive, is the meaning behind it, the purpose for which it is used. Some people, take for instance Joseph Nicolosi and his crew, manage to be way more offensive while using a very subtle and appearently perfectly polite language registry. I don't like the word "***", and I don't like expressions like "whoa that's gay", but I don't feel like I need to point a gun at people who use those words, even because majority of them are "unaware culprits". They use those words without bad intentions, it's just habit. I'm not saying that we should completely ignore how people use certain words, it has a certain relevance of course, but sometimes I'm afraid people are too focused on the words instead than on what really matters (the meaning behind them and educating other people about not being racists). It's like, what was that metaphore? The finger pointing to the moon and people being able to see just the finger? Yes, something like that, imho. Weither or not it's with or without bad intentions using words like that is wrong and can be offensive. I admit, I get offended easily and you know what? I don't give a damn. I defend myself for me being who I'm and I'll gladly defend and even fight to defend fellow gays like myself. I could give 2 craps about your military experience nor how old you are nor what rank you were, all I care about is helping and keeping safe those of us in the LGBT community. I hate the fact that some Straight people use those words and even more sadder that some of us in the LGBT community use those words. Even if it's "all in good fun" I find NO humor in any one using those words. Refia's post is EXACTLY what I've been trying to say. And yes, I did read your post and this what it has led too, so yes I read it and I don't agree with you. I didn't intend to turn this into a debate but I guess that's how it turned out. Now if you want to agrue more about this, take it up with me in the PMs. I'm done talking to you. Bahamut.Protectorchrono said: » I could give 2 craps about your military experience I've never been into military, not even the mandatory national service call-up (back then it was still mandatory in my country) I don't see how you got that I was in the military :O I mean, sometimes I wish I had been, I've been having "gay cameratism wet dreams" when I was younger lol I said I've been a militant in the gay associations world, it's a completely different thing lol. I dunno how it is in the USA but in Europe there is a pretty big network of local and national gay rights associations. They think about political and social stuff, but also small things like offering gay people a place where they can go to have fun, talk to other people, find out it's not too bad being gay, and even special help with psychologysts, support etc. Maybe stuff like this is not common in the US outside of the big cities like San Francisco etc? I'm ignorant about that, I apologize. Asura.Sechs said: » Bahamut.Protectorchrono said: » I could give 2 craps about your military experience I've never been into military, not even the mandatory national service call-up (back then it was still mandatory in my country) I don't see how you got that I was in the military :O I mean, sometimes I wish I had been, I've been having "gay cameratism wet dreams" when I was younger lol I said I've been a militant in the gay associations world, it's a completely different thing lol. I dunno how it is in the USA but in Europe there is a pretty big network of local and national gay rights associations. They think about political and social stuff, but also small things like offering gay people a place where they can go to have fun, talk to other people, find out it's not too bad being gay, and even special help with psychologysts, support etc. Maybe stuff like this is not common in the US outside of the big cities like San Francisco etc? I'm ignorant about that, I apologize. It's 6am and I'm nearly asleep. I meant to type "you're". I assumed by Militant, I had Military on the brain. Look, I'm sorry I snapped at you, it's just some of what you said was very rude and I don't take to kindly to negativity like that. I'm sorry again, but that doesn't change how I feel and what I said. But I apologize for lashing out at you, please accept my apologizes. Lolololol it's fine don't worry about it.
You didn't do anything wrong. U've been a bit vocal maybe, but you just voiced your opinion. Wether I agree or disagree it's fine regardless. ;)
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I'm gonna be lazy and copy a post I wrote in another thread. Tired of writing the same basic thing every time this comes up. >___> I agree with parts of what everyone has said so far.
Main takeaways: *I disagree with the premise that the misuse of certain words isn't harmful. *I agree that it's better to explain why something is harmful than it is to silence it. Unfortunately, sometimes this isn't possible. *Most people who speak insensitively only do so because they haven't had occasion to consciously think about their words--the rest are just lazy. They may be excused, but not justified. *I generally only attempt to have this conversation with people whom I already respect or whose friendship I value. Otherwise, my friendship is too valuable to waste on someone whose only reason for being a *** is laziness. I'm pretty lazy myself, so it's a lame excuse anyway. :P
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Amazing 2.0 annie lenox http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KBAQlwNsfN0
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