Aettir is the best swap you can make for PDTII, for -55% total DT. Also, post your set so people can see the gear they would be suggesting you swap out.
The 25% from Epeo is nice but it is not NEEDED for anything it is merely a better cushion so your healers can suck less. Just go off the bgwiki guide sets and you will be fine with Aettir. The big thing with Epeo is that it helps with the DPS side of holding hate but you said you have Lion so you really should be OK.
possible suggestion that would be simple in terms of what needed swapped- I'd consider AF+3 body for Relic+3 body. Boost your meva and some other elemental resistances while staying at 49% PDT- close enough in my book for the benefits that AF+3 body grants.