Node 285
You people...
Random Arguments & Strawmen #15
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Random Arguments & Strawmen #15
Us people what?
Terrible.
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Black Friday Sale on White House Officials A ‘Yuge’ Success
Quote: Washington DC: Goodyear Satire Co.— Eighty-seven ambassadorships were sold by the incoming Trump Administration on Black Friday, shattering the record held by the 2004 George W. Bush transition team. “The sale raised $750 million, which will be used to fund much needed voter suppression efforts,” according to sales lead Tom Colonnade. “The sale was a yuge success,” beamed President-Elect Trump. “Bigly.” With rock bottom prices, Cabinet secretaries were in especially high demand. The Department of Education went to Betsy DeVos of the Amway fortune for $9.5 million in donations. “So every time you buy a can of spray-on-shoe polish, you’re helping cut funds for your child’s public school. We call that a win-win,” said Colonnade. Sources say this effort is all part of Donald Trump’s plan to repurpose America into a profit center. “Why fight for human rights when there’s money to be made?” asked First Daughter Ivanka Trump. “Would you like to buy my watch?” “We’re doing this needed restructuring work for America at no charge because of love of America,” said the President-Elect. “Love, and a small piece of the back end.” Trump was especially proud that so many of the buyers have absolutely no experience in government, like himself. “We’re proud to be replacing corrupt Washington insiders with corrupt Washington outsiders,” Trump said. “That’s the Trump legacy.” In a related story, the previously principled Republican Party sold out to the alt-right for $32.50 and the chance to repeal Obamacare. If you missed out on all the fun don’t worry. The biggest bargains are still to be had on Cyber Monday. Dignity will be 50 % off. This is why I think new articles need (Satire) or something in front of them. So many idiots are going to think this is real.
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7 hospitalized as Ohio State reports active shooter on campus.
:( Breaking News not much more info at the moment. One shooter is dead.
He apparently ran people over with his car and started stabbing people with a knife.
8 people injured and one in critical condition. Suspect is dead, another is apparently trapped in a parking garage. Set off a fire alarm to get people out of the classrooms apparently. Zerowone said: » 7 hospitalized as Ohio State reports active shooter on campus. :( Breaking News not much more info at the moment. Let me guess Trump somehow caused this ! Also I'm disappointed what happened to "Trump won you lil shits" title ?
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Lakshmi.Zerowone said: » Never too early to joke about a school shooting !  Lakshmi.Zerowone said: » Jokes require timing Clearly, none of us are professional comedians....or The Comedian 
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fonewear said: » Also I'm disappointed what happened to "Trump won you lil shits" title ? We could run with his tweet from yesterday: "In addition to winning the Electoral College in a landslide, I won the popular vote if you deduct the millions of people who voted illegally" @realDonaldTrump. Trump is Nausi.
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Lakshmi.Zerowone said: » fonewear said: » Also I'm disappointed what happened to "Trump won you lil shits" title ? We could run with his tweet from yesterday: "In addition to winning the Electoral College in a landslide, I won the popular vote if you deduct the millions of people who voted illegally" @realDonaldTrump. I don't follow tweets President be damned ! Twitter is for young people.  Going by age demographics you fall into the 62%.
When the latest political news is a recount we have run out of political things to discuss. I think Jill Stein just likes to see her name in the "papers".
fonewear said: » When the latest political news is a recount we have run out of political things to discuss. I think Jill Stein just likes to see her name in the "papers". There is more going on than that. That's just what people want to focus on because they're either hoping for a chance or enjoy belittling motion. If Trump actually believes he won the popular vote and that the 2M+ in favor of Clinton is due to people voting illegally; that in and of itself would grounds for a recount with respect to preserving the legitimacy of the voting process. Of course he is merely pandering. Other things going on: Death of Fidel Castro South Koreans want President Park Geun-hye impeached Syrian Government forces advance on Aleppo Anti-Terror police patrols on the streets of London Princess Beatrice cutting Ed Sheerans face. Zerowone said: » Clearly you're a professional post recycler. That or I'm experiencing Deja Vu. Or I'm old and forgetfull... or all three... also, my neice that goes to osu is safe. so go crazy with the upset michigan fan / school shooter jokes foney
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