D:
I was forced into the creative use of the Queen's English at work today. A couple of my coworkers are hunters, and apparently they have in it their fool heads to go find themselves a mountain lion. Sure, whatever.
Apparently they also have it in their fool heads that they need a beagle to accomplish this task. So they asked me this morning if they could borrow my Pixel to go hunt a mountain lion for them. I said "No."
So they spend half an hour trying to talk me into it. "There's like a -2% chance that she'd get hurt!" they said. "It's instinctive for beagles to find mountain lions!" they said. "All she'd have to do is find the trail, follow it, and they start barking when she found the lion!" they said. I responded by changing my answer to "Hell no."
Another 15 minutes of awful arguments later, and I changed my answer to "F*ck no."
Is it customary to ask people if you can take their pets out to the middle of nowhere, set them loose (when they have a reputation of not coming back when called, mind you) in the vague hopes that they will find the trail that you want instead of a squirrel trail (she's very interested in squirrels) and then in another vague hope that they will bark (when they are actually shockingly quiet for their breed) and then allow them to get into a fight (that they will almost certainly lose) with a mountain lion until you can catch up? And THEN vaguely hope that they have good enough aim to shoot the mountain lion, NOT the beagle?
F*ck. No. >.>
Even if I approved of trophy hunting (which I don't)
Even if my beagle was trained for this (which she's not)
Even if they hadn't lied to me by saying there was no chance she'd be hurt (which they did)
And even if there actually WAS no chance she'd get hurt (which there is)
The answer would still be no. <.< Some peoples' damn kids need to bugger off my dog before someone hurts someone else. Namely, before I hurt them. Bah and humbug!